As a novelist and lawyer, I don’t have much time to reflect, but recently at an interview about my latest novel To Lahore with Love by Harvard University Students as part of a book club, I was asked this question. And what a brilliant question it is. Casting my mind back, I recall my younger days being great fun, but also angst ridden. These are things I know now that I wish someone had shared with me in my younger days.
Be brave and don’t be afraid to focus on what you love
Life flies by, and our younger self feels we have years to decide what we want from life. This leads to the almost inevitable decision to do the safe thing now and follow our dreams and passions later. My advice; don’t do that.
Explore what draws you, what heightens your curiosity or what you know you are passionate about now.
We are privileged to have choices and opportunities, so don’t throw such gifts away. I can honestly say the greatest chance of success comes from finding and doing what you love. I feel gifted as I love the law I practise and it is important to me that basic human rights whether you are black, Asian, female, male etc are not violated. I am also passionate about story and being a novelist is a dream come true.
Fiction and story draws me in for many reasons, but the main one is that I believe it is the best medium to express great and profound truths.
The Telegraph quotes Hina Belitz as being ‘practised in the art of writing deeply moving prose’. She is a novelist and a lawyer. Her latest novel is called To Lahore with Love, recently published by Headline. She practises law at Partners Employment Lawyers (part of Excello Law) and is also a committee member of the Association of Women Solicitors.
Don’t try to fit in –think for yourself
Perhaps the most difficult thing to discover about yourself are your prejudices and fears. And we all have them, whether we are from a BAME background or not. A prejudice is after all a prejudgment, meaning a decision you have made without considered thought.
But such hidden fears will often make us conform to the majority view, even if it isn’t really ours making it doubly hard to discover who we are and what we love. Being able to think for yourself, independently of the pressure to accept the views of others around us is part of becoming uniquely you. And that uniqueness is what ultimately strikes a chord with others and leads to true success.
As the world becomes so digitally connected via social media and so physically disconnected due to viruses and, yes, social media, having the ability to think for yourself without fear of how others will see you is becoming an increasingly rare treasure. Good news, though, coming from a BAME background makes this easier because we’ve had a certain amount of training in being different from the crowd already, so count your blessings.
When I look back on my life, it’s plain to see how the times I tried to fit in felt like forcing myself into a dress that was two sizes too small. It was uncomfortable and all wrong.
Embrace your difference and don’t stress
Being from a BAME background is like a secret weapon. Ultimately, we are all carved from the challenges we have had to face and let’s face it, being any kind of minority amongst a majority presents a challenge.
So consider your difference a kind of ‘super hero’ training and embrace it whole heartedly. It is a gift. It is only when we are authentically ourselves that we discover true joy and peace. And authenticity is like a halo that everyone can sense, so my advice is to embrace it with open arms.